My house was a revolving door. You walk in, you walk out, you get whatever you can eat, you leave, you go hang out with friends. I’m on my mission, my sister’s on another mission, my dad is working trying to provide, my mom is trying to do the same thing. And somehow, we’re all co-existing with each other.
That’s who my mom is. She’s a listener and a doer. She’s a woman driven by compassion, by faith, by a fierce sense of justice and a heart full of love. So, this November, I’m voting for a woman who is my role model, as a mother, and as an advocate. A woman who has spent her entire life fighting for families and children.
I’ve always competed in those shows. Like, I won ‘Fear Factor’, I did ‘I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here’, I did ‘The Mole’, ‘Celebrity Apprentice’ with Donald Trump. I’ve done a lot of those shows, all in the hope of being a blessing to my mom’s organization.
After River was born, I remember being in the bedroom by myself, overwhelmed because he wasn’t latching well, and I yelled, ‘Dave, I need help! Can you get in here?’ Suddenly my husband, my mom, and my in-laws were all in the doorway. I just melted into tears. It really does take a village.
I’ve been dealing with racism since I was a little kid! My dad’s super black, from Puerto Rico. Then my mom’s super white – she’s Puerto Rican too, but she grew up in Milwaukee. As a Latino in the U.S. I’ve seen how we are treated differently based on the color of our skin.
We weren’t rich by any means, but we had each other, so we were rich in family. When you don’t have a lot, it just fuels that creativity. So it manifested in us doing characters of people in the neighborhood or doing impersonations of Mom and Dad. The comedy bug, it takes over.
There have been times when I have goofed up, and like every adolescent, I sometimes did get led the wrong way. I would come back home really scared to face my mom’s wrath and anger, but surprisingly, I never got to face one. She would always tell me in a very nice manner that what I did was wrong and that I should correct myself.
I was selling stuff probably since I could remember, like 6 or 7 years old. I was always out there helping my mom and dad sell watches, glasses, CDs, DVDs, stuff like that. Whatever we could put our hands on. I did it until I was around 17. But I was just doing it because I had to. There was no other option.
I think that when you start rolling with an entourage, you attract attention, and you tend to create this whole big thing. My mom taught me that when you keep a low profile, most people tend to totally miss you because they’re not expecting anything.
My mom was funny and nutty. I suppose she had to be to survive raising 10 kids. To cope and keep a cap on things, she kept us buoyant and harmonious. She wouldn’t let us express anger, which later on landed me in therapy but also made it easier for me to play laid-back, measured roles.
I think Alison Krauss is one of the most amazing singers ever. As a songwriter – this is gonna sound cheesy – I love Randy Newman. And my mom passed on a love of Bob Dylan and Joni Mitchell. At one point I was so into the Indigo Girls, just like I was so into the Dixie Chicks, those female harmonies.
My first experience in a movie theater was Dick Tracy. There was a scene with a guy with a Tommy gun and a wall of fire behind him. I panicked, screamed, and jumped out of my seat. And I ran six New York city blocks, running into the street and almost got hit by a bunch of cars and had my mom chasing after a panic-stricken four-year-old.
My mom is actually a former prima ballerina, and all the women in my family are associated either with dance or choreography or acting, so I’m very lucky in a way because I grew up in a family of artists. I’ve been dancing since I was a little kid.
My friend had told me about ‘Stranger Things’ and how I had to watch it. I was like, ‘OK, I will!’ I binged it in, like, a day and was like, ‘Oh my gosh, Mom, you need to watch this show. Everyone needs to watch this.’ A week later, I got the breakdown for Max. A month later, I got the part.
I remember the first time seeing myself on TV, when my family was watching the documentary ‘Eyes on the Prize’ for the first time. There were pictures of people going up the school stairs, and Mom said, ‘Oh, that’s you!’ I said, ‘I can’t believe this. This is important.’
If you go from a structure where you have the support and that partner and that construction of a family and that’s broken apart, I think that’s probably a lot harder than always being a single mom and having the father being a support in another area.
I grew up in a household in which they’d always play old skool classic R&B love songs – Al Green, Sam Cooke, Marvin Gaye… And my mom has even said that, when I was in her womb, she’d put the headphones to her stomach and play those songs to me!
I remember telling my mom, ‘Mom, I’m gay, but I’m not going to march in a parade or anything.’ That’s what I was telling my parents and all my friends and everything. I’m gay, but I’m not going to be on a float or something. Cut to five years later, and I was the grand marshal of the gay pride parade.
I think my parents are the first influence on me music-wise. My dad was into Motown and soul, and my mom was into British ‘80s pop, like The Trashcan Sinatras. I grew up on that. It was great. They were the first people to really bring music into my life.
To me, acting used to be just, ‘Get my face out there, get girls, make a little bit of money, make my mom proud.’ It was just like sports. But there were moments in ‘Moonlight’ that I really felt like I had to know why he is the way he is. Or just people in general – why this person walks around with a frown on their face instead of a smile.
When I graduated from high school, my mom and dad were saying I needed to go to college, but I said I wanted to pursue my dream of acting. At the end of my high school career, they quit their jobs, and we moved out to California on a leap of faith.
A few weeks after my mom passed in November of 2013, I came back from an injury and entered the Egg Bowl in the second half against Ole Miss. I’ll never forget the feeling when I walked back out on the field. As I walked into the Egg Bowl, the crowd stood up and clapped like they were enveloping me in a giant hug.
In ‘Bras & Broomsticks,’ Rachel Weinstein gets the shock of her life when she discovers that her mom and her younger sister, Miri, are both… witches! In ‘Frogs & French Kisses,’ Rachel and her witchy family are back – Miri is busy zapping up ways to save the world, while Mom has gone boy crazy and become a magicaholic.
Mom still has a huge, beautifully decorated Christmas tree. The whole family comes together after midnight mass and has the traditional plum cake and wine. We spend the night at mom’s home, and in the morning we wake up and open the presents. In the afternoon, we sit down to have a traditional Christmas lunch.
When I’m not the Tiger Mom, I’m a professor at Yale Law School, and if one thing is clear to me from years of teaching, it’s that there are many ways to produce fabulous kids. I have amazing students; some of them have strict parents, others have lenient parents, and many come from family situations that defy easy description.
