Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can’t help but smile on it.
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt of, not swallowed.
One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.
In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy…to wit–the wag of a dog’s tail.
Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time.
Don’t put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.
To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself once in a while.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist – it reduces him to his fighting weight.
When a man comes to me for advice I find out the kind of advice he wants and I give it to him.
The happiest time in any man’s life is when he is in red-hot pursuit of a dollar with a reasonable prospect of overtaking it.
Every man has his follies – and often they are the most interesting things he has got.
Marrying for love may be a bit risky but it is so honest that God can’t help but smile on it.
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you do hold well.
It ain’t no disgrace for a man to fall but to lie there and grunt is.
If it wasn’t for faith there would be no living in this world we couldn’t even eat hash with any safety.
As a general thing when a woman wears the pants in a family she has a good right to them.
Nature never makes any blunders when she makes a fool she means it.
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
It ain’t so much trouble to get rich as it is to tell when we have got rich.
Don’t mistake pleasures for happiness. They are a different breed of dog.
If you ever find happiness by hunting for it you will find it as the old woman did her lost spectacles safe on her nose all the time.
Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one spot.
The trouble ain’t that people are ignorant: it’s that they know so much that ain’t so.
The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves but who think others are.
My advice to those who are about to begin in earnest the journey of life is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
Love looks through a telescope envy through a microscope.
Most men would rather be charged with malice than with making a blunder.
To bring up a child in the way he should go travel that way yourself once in a while.
A dog Is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
Money will buy a pretty good dog but it won’t buy the wag of his tail.
Be like a postage stamp-stick to one thing until you get there.
Debt is a trap which man sets and baits himself and then deliberately gets into.
There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can’t tell the truth without lying.
It is a very delicate job to forgive a man without lowering him in his estimation and yours too.
It is not only the most difficult thing to know oneself but the most inconvenient one too.
It is not only the most difficult thing to know oneself but the most inconvenient too.
Debt is a trap which man sets and baits himself and then deliberately gets into.
When a man gets talking about himself he seldom fails to be eloquent and often reaches the sublime.
As scarce as truth is the supply has always been in excess of the demand.
There are people who are always anticipating trouble and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen.
It is the little things that fret and worry us you can dodge an elephant but not a fly.
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
In youth we run into difficulties. In old age difficulties run into us.
I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry.
If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time.
A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug.
Genius ain’t anything more than elegant common sense.
There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing.
As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them.
Men mourn for what they have lost women for what they ain’t got.
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place.
There’s a great power in words, if you don’t hitch too many of them together.
Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain’t so wicked as their neighbors.
There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply.
The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear.
There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can’t tell the truth without lying.
As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.
There’s a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven’t the time to enjoy it.
There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory.
Every man has his follies – and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won’t buy the wag of his tail.
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.
Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain’t lawful tender for a loaf of bread.
Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere, wide awake, on tiptoe.
Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.
There are two kinds of fools: those who can’t change their opinions and those who won’t.