When everything else is shattering, you feel like the one true constant.
I look down at his beautiful face, shining with so much love and admiration for me, and I know that every struggle I’ve faced up to this point has all been worth it, because it led me to him.
I plant a gentle parting kiss on his lips, our strategy is well and truly screwed at this stage anyway. We barely lasted a day.
My romantic history since arriving on Novo has been non-existent, but I don’t know what, if anything, came before; thanks to the government’s cerebral pilfering.
The Suitors Ball is fast approaching and it’s a nasty reminder that my suitor will be chosen shortly. I feel sorry for the poor unfortunate guy, whichever one of them it happens to be.
Are you in any pain? (Ariana Skyee)Only my heart. (Cal Remus)
I don’t think I’d feel any more violated if he’d stripped me bare. I might as well have lain down before him openly exposing all my flaws and my fears, inviting him to psychoanalyze me.
I was wrong last night. Kyler isn’t just trouble. He’s an apocalypse-level disaster waiting to happen. I need to find some fallout shelter to hide in. And quick.
He knows I’ve seen something in him. Something I recognize, only because it exists in me too.
This whole scenario is sick, depraved, but also grossly fascinating. I’ve become a Peeping Tom. And. It’s. Turning. Me. On.
The craving to touch her is like an itch I can’t scratch.
This girl holds my heart in her hand and she’s squishing it to nothing with her confession.
I won’t pressure you, Ari, but I’m not opposed to subtle acts of persuasion.
Heaviness coats my brain, and I’m surprised at the turn in our conversation; we’re getting into the deep stuff. “Right now, you and me? This feels like fate, if fate can be felt.
Ari is beautiful beyond comparison, and she has my heart and my soul for eternity. I thought I made that abundantly clear last night, but it appears I have further work to do.
I kiss her for way too long at the door, and not for the first time, I wish that I could stay with her, to help chase those dark clouds away.
Ari looks fiercely resolute. It’s the same look she has on her face at the start of every race: Dogged determination. My heart and head enter into full-on combat mode.
I would cry if I could, but instead I just feel my heart rip apart.
There is so much that needs to be said and too many things that can’t ever be said.
I remember how amazing it felt to be loved by him and how he was all I ever wanted.
No matter how many times I’ve thought that the worst is behind us, something else always happens to remind me that the worst is yet to come.
We’ve all changed; shaped by circumstances we’ve been thrust into, molded by the choices we’ve made.
Part of me can’t understand how Mom could do this. But there’s that other part of me that can readily relate. Because I feel a pull in two different directions too.
I remember how amazing it felt to be loved my him and how he was all I ever wanted.
This was never what I wanted for us, but things change. Plans change. People change. I’ve faced the reality of my destiny and now I need to embrace that.
Remembering the good has also resurrected the bad.
Sorry has got to be the most over-used cliched get-out clause in the history of mankind. Tossed out flippantly without any real meaning or substance.
He’s a lovely guy, but there’s no spark between us whatsoever. It just goes to show, that even with all their fancy assessment tools, the government can’t legislate for chemistry.
It’s degrading being routinely subjected to a battery of medical tests to ensure I continue to deserve a place in this new world.
It seems like I have lived a lifetime in just one day.
Most of the girls I’ve met since moving here have failed to ignite any modicum of enduring interest. Of course, I’ve dated; I’m seventeen years old and as horny as the next guy.
I wouldn’t change a thing. I want you. I’ll always want you.
I have never seen so much male hotness in one place in my entire life,” Rach rasps. “I fucking love America.
He is the biggest asshole on the planet,” Jarod says. “And in a planet that’s currently drowning in assholes, that’s saying a lot.
I engage in subtle stalking. That’s entirely different and perfectly socially acceptable.
Logan must survive. That is the only truth. The only goal. My sole mission.
We love each other. You love me, you do.” His eyes beseech me to believe it, to remember it, to feel it.
All I can think about is how I wanted to share those firsts with Logan and how I never knew it was an impossibility because it had already been taken away from me.