There’s a quote of hers [Lucille Ball] that I’ve always loved: ‘I guess I would rather regret the things I’ve done than to regret the things I’ve never done.
I have always grown from my problems and challenges from the things that don’t work out. That’s when I’ve really learned.
When you have a dream, you’ve got to grab it and never let go.
Everybody I know who is funny, it’s in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke, though I don’t like to tell jokes. But I think you have to be born with a sense of humor and a sense of timing.
My mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too.
Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.
Celebrity was a long time in coming it will go away. Everything goes away.
But I didn’t ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn’t even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.
I do the ‘New York Times’ crossword puzzle every morning to keep the old grey matter ticking.
But I don’t begrudge anybody, because I know how hard it is to have that dream and to make it happen, whether or not it’s just to put a roof over your head and food on the table.
It’s also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I’ve been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That’s why we’re here, after all, to help others.
My interesting diet tips are eat early and don’t nosh between meals. I mean, I can pack it away.
My grandmother and I saw an average of eight movies a week, double features, second run.
I’m really not that funny in real life! But I am the best audience one could find. I love to laugh.
Funny is funny. I dare anyone to look at Tim Conway and Harvey Korman doing the dentist sketch, which is more than 40 years old, and not scream with laughter.
Edgy is fine – I’m not a prude by any stretch of the imagination – but what’s wrong with a good ol’ belly laugh? I miss that.
Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
I wish my mother had left me something about how she felt growing up. I wish my grandmother had done the same. I wanted my girls to know me.
You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That’s an education in itself.
I loved the Kennedy Center Honors because you just sit there, smile, wave, and cry.
It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it’s too bad that we don’t have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team’s lawyers.