A man should be taller older heavier uglier and hoarser than his wife.
Half the time men think they are talking business, they are wasting time.
One of the surprising things in this world is the respect a worthless man has for himself.
A boy doesn’t have to go to war to be a hero he can say he doesn’t like pie when he sees there isn’t enough to go around.
Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.
When people hear good music, it makes them homesick for something they never had, and never will have.
A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice.
Never tell a secret to a bride or a groom wait until they have been married longer.
When a man has no reason to trust himself, he trusts in luck.
The little trouble in the world that is not due to love is due to friendship.
Instead of loving your enemies – treat your friends a little better.
It may be a cold, clammy thing to say, but those that treat friendship the same as any other selfishness seem to get the most out of it.
If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers.
If a man has money, it is usually a sign, too, that he knows how to take care of it; don’t imagine his money is easy to get simply because he has plenty of it.
Some men storm imaginary Alps all their lives, and die in the foothills cursing difficulties which do not exist.
There is always a type of man who says he loves his fellow men, and expects to make a living at it.
Men have as exaggerated an idea of their rights as women have of their wrongs.
The worst feeling in the world is the homesickness that comes over a man occasionally when he is at home.