We grow up in a belief system according to which children should always make their parents proud and happy (instead of making themselves proud and happy) – and that’s unfortunately the belief system in most cultures.
People have a much greater chance of finding something they’ll enjoy doing and making those greatest contributions when they trust themselves and are free to make their own life choices (are not marionettes in the hands of their parents).
It’s a mistake to believe that they (parents) are responsible for their children’s best future. This responsibility is on their children, and that’s the message they should be conveying to their children on a daily basis.
Pushing them (children) into a career that is “practical”/ “safe”/ prestigious/ well-paying doesn’t count as help. It’s how parents satisfy their own needs.
The time to build your future is in your teenage years and your 20s, but equally, in your 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond.
You don’t need to provide your parents with a “success story” to share at gatherings.
They know a lot, but they don’t know everything, and they can’t advise you on anything.They can only tell you what they believe worked / or didn’t work for them.
Mistakes are part of life. And yet, for some reason, most parents in this world, wish their children made no mistakes at all, or as little as possible.
It’s not their (parents’) job to prevent their children from making mistakes, because mistakes are a normal part of our lives. It’s like preventing those children from having a real experience. A real life.
If parents want “success stories” to share at gatherings they should provide themselves with those, and they should not use their children for that purpose.
It’s entirely on our children to build their best futures. Not on us, parents. And we should be imprinting this message on our children’s brains from as early as possible.
They (parents) have been doing this (imposing their beliefs about life on you) since you were born. That’s more than enough to establish a habit.
They (parents) use this guilt-tripping to stop you from fulfilling your plans, but most important, from believing something they don’t (something which contradicts their beliefs)
It’s safer/ easier to follow the script and complain how broken some things are in that script, than to attempt to change those things.
We are all entitled to our own share of mistakes and learning experiences in life. No one should take them away from us. Not even our parents.
Who said that parents’ beliefs should be adopted by their children?
Young adults rebel against the pre-invented/ packaged world, but sooner or later they stop and they also become proponents of the tried and true.